Hyrule Screw Ups With Link
by Ozenjin
Summary: Wha evil cucoo aaah aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Holy mother of god! The pain the pain!
1. Chapter 1

Jknights4eva

Hyrule Screwups with Link

Everybody you know about Link the hero of time and blah blah blah ect. Well we all know him as an awsome guy who has a sword going postal on Ganondorf. Well anyways did you know how many screw ups he made on his adventure? Did you know link is afraid of chicken? Now let us tell the story of his fear of cucoos. (Some music plays and a cheap confetti blasts) Link was one day in the market looking for food. When he stumbled upon the in-n-out(a burger resturaunt). He pushed the door open and walked to the ordering counter. "One burger please!" "Ok that will be 50 rupees." "Okay lets see I have 49 rupees? b..bb..bu...bbut." (dramatic music)

"Well are you going to pay or not?'' "Sorry im short hehe." (5 minutes later)"AND STAY OUT!"Well, then he thought of his own idea to open up a HFC(hyrule fried cucoo). This is the important part so if you are not reading this part you are a toootal loooser. Link came upon some cucoos on the fields. He thought to himself he would start his buiness here. He swung his sword at a cucoo and it went crazy with bloodshot eyes. A swarm of chickens attacked link. "Ah my eeyes! No not there my spine! Ah my left kidney!" (ow that must have hurt) in his attempt to become rich he was sent to Hyrule's first hospital.

Now lets tell you about link and his experience in the lost woods. One day he was just following the trace of the catchy music (saria's song). He then got to the point where he had to face a white wolf. He pulled out his sword but it was too long and he failed to pull it out. (30 seconds later) "Ah its clawing out my eyes ow ow ow ow ow!" "That's it!" slash he killed the wolfos but was sent back to the hospital. After days of wearing eyepatches. His eyes were better. But his vision was soo bad.He thought a cucoo was a silver rupee and...(4 seconds later)"THE PAIN!THE AGONY!"(hardcore battle sfx flip on) (Shows Link bleeding on the floor externaly and sobbing)They put him on a strecher and dumped him into Lake Hylia.MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...I mean how tragic!

Read &review!Or i will use flames on your corpses!


	2. Chapter 2

Link's experience with a zora

If you read the last chapter you know Link was tossed into Lake Hylia, well he was saved by zoras. When he went to their domain he was warmly welcomed. Now read carefully. Link reaches into his pouch and pulls out a small box he opens it and the zorasquestions himwhat's in it Link says ''chopped up and fried zoras want some? "(2minutes later) "DONT SHOW YOUR FACE HERE EVER AGAIN!" "whats his problem, well i must continue on my quest. When he was kicked out he read a sign that said if you shoot the sun at the moment of sunrise you shall gain the power of fire. So, he waited to dawn and he shot the sun. Soon after he saw an arrow with a red cryrstal on the tip, he picked it up and gained the ability to use fire arrows without the fire! So he went to test it. He thought that if he shot a cucoo it would fry so he had no worries. He shot one and lets say "things happened" "AAAAGH THE PAIN THE AGONY...AGAIN!" Once again he was sent to the Hyrule's first hospital. This time in the hospital he had to pay up for all the times he came but he just said "put it on my tab." "Sir, your bill comes down to 250,000 rupees will that be cash or charge." "Holy crap i need to take out a loan." (2 days after the loan) A man walks in "you missed a payment on you medical bill i need to reposses your hookshot." "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO I NEED THAT!" The man walks out the door.(dramatic music plays and rain falls). Well if you want to read more we will update a story every week, thank you and goodbye.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 finally here srry for not updating for so long lots of "stuff happens ya know"

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Link was just going across the field one day on his trusty steed, Epona. He sees a Poe "HOLY

MAFARAEREAWERIAWEOIURLARD!!!!" Link ran around is circles PANICKING whilst the poe and

Epona had a game of Go fish. "NEEEIGH" translates into "got any 5's?" "nope" "IMPOSIBBLE

YOU CHEATED!!!". ok anywaaaay... Ever realize when you run over stuff with Epona its like 1hit

ko. Well Link was in a hurry so he went up ganon's tower on a horse. Ganon was right in front of

him "WERE GONNA CRASH EJECT! EJECT!!" Link quickly swooshed off as the horse kept going

and (this scene may contain too much violence so we will be broadcasting some random crap!"

"Tired of that garbage that you eat which you call "food". Not anymore come down to H-Donalds we

Double cheeseburger only 1$ (gasp) YES ONLY ONE DOLLA!!! BUY TODAY OR WE HUNT YOU

DOWN AND KILL YOU!" Now back to the scene... Ganon is all dead and stuff but all of a

sudden his corpse FARTS. "OH NO THE TOWER IS COLLAPSING" LINK RAN LIKE HELL DOWN

THE TOWER "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH". WHEW

MADE IT OUT. "well now that's over lets get going on our next adventure )".

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WOOT thats it for this chappy they are really short huh srry but i dont have that much to type gotta beat windwaker a couple more times for more story well see ya til next time.


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